I got back on Monday from a week in MN. It was nice to hang out with Michelle and her husband Chris, but a part of me was starting to feel a little bad about the wedding toast that Chris had asked Michelle to ask me to do.
I had over a month to work on it, yet I showed up to MN with NO CLUE what I would say. I told myself, "I will work on it in the evenings, after Michelle and Chris go to sleep" but instead I found my lazy self fast asleep after bidding them good night. Each night. For a week!
But I guess some subconscious part of me was working on it even though my conscious self felt too overwhelmed. The day before the wedding, something just clicked ON and turned off my procrastination button. I stole away secretly to take notes here and there, I walked off with Michelle's brother and sister-in-law to harvest more stories, and I thought and thought and thought.
When I got up to start my toast, I felt weak in the knees. This is not a feeling I'm used to, but then again this was really important to me! I started off asking who in the room had seen "the Gremlins"-- I looked over at Michelle and could see her nervously looking at Chris like "Oh my gosh, where is she going to go with this?!"
I was in a room full of people who knew Michelle-- so they either loved her too, or at least liked her an awful lot. There was so much inside me that I wanted to share-- all these little stories about times that I've spent with Michelle, ways in which she has blown me away, ways in which she has fortified my spirit, ways in which she has made me laugh until I cried. Everything just clicked.
A woman sitting at my table told me, "You could do this on TV!" But I laughed and explained "not everybody would be so interested in hearing all about Michelle..." ;-) All kidding aside though, it was a real high for me.